IF THIS IS LOVE

First Posted September 10, 2009

My original post in 2009 was much longer. In that post, I recounted a story about what Tammy told me Stukel had written in 1991. In short, she had told me that she had stumbled across a note he had written saying that he wanted to f*ck her cold body on a cold slab. I never saw this note but just heard about the note from Tammy right after she saw it. She was upset enough to pull me out of a movie theater to tell me about this. Her upset made me upset.

When law enforcement interviewed me in 1992 (I had taken emergency leave from basic training to attend Tammy’s funeral) I recounted this story, not having a clue of its relevance.

At the time I recounted the story to law enforcement, I was probably too naïve to understand what this statement even meant. And I’m pretty sure I did not know what a cold slab was. I also did not have Stukel on my radar as a suspect because when I left for basic training, Tammy told me she was never going to have anything to do with Stukel or his friends again. That was how naïve I was at age eighteen.

In 1996, the judge heard my testimony in closed chambers. The prosecution argued it should be admissible as hearsay under duress, but the judge threw the testimony out, ruling that it was irrelevant due to the length of time between Tammy telling me about Stukel’s writings and Tammy’s death.

So let’s forget what Tammy told me. This hearsay under duress was inadmissible.

These quotes all came from a two-paged hand-written composition entitled “If This Is Love, I’ll Take It On The Face” seized by law enforcement on Oct. 5, 1992 from Eric Stukel’s bedroom and later determined to have been written by Stukel:

“Sometimes I hate Tammy, but I really miss her.
I admit I played with her mind.
Someone special sent me here to change her.
We made love forever. She is the greatest to me.
I have no girl, no car, but I have pot.
I treated her like shit.
I would give my life just to hold her.
I am taking her to L.A. with me, even if I have to kill her.
Kill Tammy, yeah I thought about it.”¹

Eric Stukel claims he just wrote this stuff “off the top of his head”² and that he didn’t mean those things.

So…Stukel writes about wanting to kill Tammy, and then she winds up dead?

Would anybody in their right mind chalk this up to mere coincidence?

I only wish the people who claim to have seen the bruises on Tammy’s body, the people who claim to have known about the abuse, the people who claim to have been a witness to Stukel punching Tammy in the face at a Jane’s Addiction concert, would have come forward to law enforcement back in 1992.

WORKS CITED

1. Rothanzl, Lorna. “Experts Testify in Stukel Trial.” Yankton Press and Dakotan. Oct. 1st, 1996.

2. Rothanzl, Lorna. “Stukel Takes Stand: Prosecution Rests, Stukel Denies Knowledge of Death.” Yankton Press and Dakotan. Oct. 3rd, 1996.